As we approach Thanksgiving, I want to give a special thanks to my wonderful wife. She has been with me through the good times and the bad times. I love her with all my heart. God brought us together 20 years ago and I have no regrets. Looking forward to what God has in store for us the next 20 years. Thank you Rena for everything, you are the best. I love you.

I think you will like this quote, "There would be fewer divorces if the husband tried as hard to keep his wife as he did to get her."

My wife and I have been married for almost 20 years, I can honestly say that my love grows deeper for her each and every day. I would not be in the ministry without God and her. As I write this she is in Connecticut with some other pastors wives until tonight. I miss her, isn't that how a marriage should be. We should miss our spouses when they are away for a couple of days or any length of time. I love my wife and I am not ashamed to say or write that.

As we continue with quotations, verses and other devotions that can help our marriages. A pastor friend brought this out in a message recently. In the introduction he puts this in there, the goal of marriage, according to the bible is completeness, oneness and unity. The verses you can check out are Ephesians 5:25,28,31. "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. vs.31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh."

I see in the ministry these last 13 years, when it comes to marriage,a disturbing number of people who are very selfish in their marriage. Everything is how can they be happy and never think about there spouse.  We live in a very selfish world.  In reality, a marriage should be using the word "we" not always the word "I". I found this quote which I think you will like, "In the word wedding, the we comes before the I"

As I try to find material on marriage, I came across something interesting. I found an article on "Nine suggestions for an ailing marriage"  One of the nine was, Trust your mate.  Trust your spouse, even if he or she is wrong--you are right in trusting.  A marriage must be based on trust.  It cannot survive with out it. I am sure that most of us would agree on this.

What a wonderful couple of days it has been.  I was able to watch a wedding on friday night, one of my family members got married.  On saturday, I was able to perform the ceremony of an elderly couple an hour away.  No matter how old or young they are it is great to see the love that they have for each other.  My prayer for both couples is that they have many years together and a lifetime of happiness. God is good.

I really like this quote "A young man prayed, "Lord give me a wife that loves thee---for then I know she will love me."

I know that I needed a laugh for the day so I went with this quote "Some husbands lay down the law and then accept their wife's amendments."

This next quote really puts things in perspective.  "A successful marriage is built on trust--and an occasional compliment."

As we continue our devotions on the "missing ingredients", we are going to publish one on Trust or lack of trust in a marriage.  I am going to leave you with this quote, "Nothing makes a marriage rust like distrust."

We are at the end of "wrong ways" to handle marital conflict, and some of you are happy that we are finished.  I don't know about you but I have been guilty of all them in the last 20 years.  Now you know the pastor is not perfect. So here it is #10. Refusing to say, "I was wrong;I'm sorry;will you forgive me."

We are getting close to the end of "wrong ways" to handle marital conflict, and I know that each one has effected me, in wanting to change.  Each and every one of us can pray, but for some reason we choose not to.  Did we forget about the verse "Pray without ceasing".  So this brings us to #9.  Failing to seek the Holy Spirit's guidance through prayer

The eighth "wrong way" to handle marital conflict is also a popular one for husband and wives.  #8. Ignoring the problem and pretending it will go away

As we continue with "wrong ways" to handle marital conflict, this one has been going on since Adam and Eve.  We are probaly all guilty of #7. Shifting the blame and not admitting my own failure

As we deal with the next "wrong way", I have dealt with couples who have constantly brought up their spouses past failures.  The marriages usually do not last.  So here is #6. Bringing up past failures (viewing today's conflict through yesterday;s pain)

We are continuing our series of  "wrong ways" to handle marital conflict and we are about half way done.  This next one is a tough one to handle, deals with the way we talk to each other while we are having conflict.  #5.  Verbal sparring with hurtful words (trying to win an argument rather than resolve the problem)  Enjoy your Sunday.

What does day 4 bring us with our series of "wrong ways" to handle marital conflict.  I am guilty of the first three so far.  We all need to work on the way we handle conflict.  I did a bible study last night where I brought out the verses Ephesian 4:26-27, where the main idea was to "not give place to the devil."  That is a way to handle conflict.  So what is #4.  Walking away and refusing to work it out

Here we are with day 3 of our 10 "wrong ways" to handle marital conflict.  How many of us have been guilty of #3.  Emotional outbursts(adult temper tantrums)  I have a 2 year old that throws temper tantrums but some of us adults have had our emotional outbursts also.  Have you been guilty of all 3 so far, their is still time for us to change.  Don't give up now.

Here we are back for day 2 of "wrong ways" to handle conflict. I believe we all have taken part in this one.  Whether on the giving or receiving end.  2. The silent treatment(relational withdrawal)